Big Brother’s Watching with Google Latitude

(Literally.)

Wondering where your girlfriend really was when she stood you up last Friday night? Curious if your buddy is in the same neighborhood where you’re pub-crawling? How about that coworker who said she was sick at home but you suspect otherwise?

Wonder no more! There’s a new tool called Google Latitude to help you keep track of your friends’ and family’s every move.

Stalk Your Friends and Family with Google Latitude

All you need is a Google / Gmail account and a GPS-enabled cell phone (smartphones without GPS may work too if they come with that phone triangulation location thingamabob). Sign onto Latitude, create your network of friends (just like you would with Facebook or Twitter), and sit back and stalk them watch where they go.

Just like Google Maps or Mapquest might pinpoint a destination, Latitude pinpoints where each of your friends are on a handy map in real time. You can adjust your privacy settings so your friends see your exact location, just the city where you are, a destination of your choosing or hide your location altogether.

I’m normally a fan of Google products, but in this case, the entire concept creeps me right the hell out.

I mean, to be able to see where my friends are at all times? It just doesn’t feel right. I feel like a spy. Or worse, a stalker.

And how did I find out about this lovely new app? While in town this weekend, my big brother Patrick extolled the virtues of Latitude and even “friended” me so we could track each other. The conversation went some like this:

Pat: You’re not on Latitude? And you call yourself a web nerd?

Me: Yeah, thanks. What the hell is Latitude?

Pat: It’s the coolest. We can follow each other’s location 24/7 on Google Maps.

Me: Why would I want to know where you are all the time?

Pat: Because it’s cool.

Charissa (Pat’s wife): No Patrick, it’s called stalking.

Despite the fact that the idea of Latitude invades every notion of privacy I have, I let Patrick set it up on my Crackberry because, well, he’s my big brother.

And let me tell ya, it took less than 24 hours to turn that sucker off.

The first and last straw was when I made a quick stop at Somerset Mall before heading to dinner Saturday night. When I mentioned the visit to my brother at dinner, he said, “Yeah, I know. I saw where you were on Latitude.”

What? That’s just creepy.

So what’s the lesson here? If you enjoy stalking others, invading the privacy of those closest to you or are possibly of the exhibitionist variety, you might totally dig Google Latitude. On the other hand, if you enjoy some semblance of privacy and are skeeved out when people — even your friends and family — know where you are before perhaps you even do, then I’d recommend you steer clear of it.

(No offense P.J.)